tired blur of events

The last few days of school feels like a tired blur of events. With classes beginning at 8 nearly every day, my alarm at 7 wakes me and I begin the daily cycle of shuffling myself from class to lab to class to lab and to more lab after school. Admittedly, the stuff I've been learning, especially in the lab classes have been pretty neat. I rather like making wax models of teeth. Drilling (or more properly, prepping) teeth for fillings is extremely challenging, especially because it's not easy to drill at odd angles, but it feels like a fun challenge (at least for now). As to my science classes, I need to put in a lot more effort to not fall asleep in class. Without my trusty friends, I am now napping too frequently through one too many lectures. I must work on my resolve to stay awake through all my classes. Perhaps a good idea would be to start with sleeping before 2am?

Untitled

With time, what is initially unfamiliar becomes familiar...and I guess I am waiting for time to work. To actually be a professional student is such an odd feeling. With this role, I am suppose to be responsible, mature and respectable, but I don't feel like I've attained any of these qualities.
I feel a little ambivalent about this whole entire thing. This is what I've been working for the last four years, but now that I'm here, I guess some of the glitter has worn off and I'm wondering, how and what now? How do I approach this?
I guess it's self-doubt that is nagging at me right now. Sometimes, I still get the feeling I don't deserve to be here and that I lack the essential qualities to become the clinician I want to be. This lack of confidence and self-assurance is terrible. I need confidence and determination to reach my goals....
Most importantly though, I know I must not trap myself in a bubble where all I know is school and grades. That happened in college and it was awful. There is always much more to life. I must remember that. There is life outside of school.